The Small Parts of the Whole

“I long to accomplish a great and noble task, 
but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks 
as if they were great and noble.” 
~Helen Keller

What are you to do if you know you are doing the best you can do with the small tasks in life? Today was one of those small tasks for me that makes life worth it. Our draft is a great celebration of a man that was loved by many. It just so happened that today we made an impact on a person who made an impact on Scott. We were at Buffalo Wild Wings and a fellow patron asked about our shirts. He was the Head Coach of the football team where Scott went to HS and worked with Scott's Dad. Afterwards I spoke with him briefly and he commented on how Scott was a person so many people like to be around. I have to greatly agree. He made so many feel special but I happen to know a little better then anyone else how big his heart made all his small tasks great and noble.

Tonight I'm sitting in the dark listening to the thunder and watching the lightning. I have moved beyond the deep grief into comfortable quiet. I know I won't be able to stop the moments of longing but I am living. I live in the small moments of my life and the memories I make. I have learned to cherish life and what happens. I try not to rush into and out of the moments. Today I had a great day of activities that make my life complete. Pedi and lunch with a new friend that I enjoy spending time. While we were at lunch my beautiful daughter surprised us by accident and we were joined at our table by Mike and Hannah. It was one of those moments that makes life all the better. It is so hard to explain how priceless that hour of conversation with three wonderful people in my life brightened my day.

Now I had prepared for the day with my change of clothes for the Draft. You see we have developed a uniform. The first year the guys surprised me with t-shirts with Scott's picture on the back. I remember the tears that first year caused and the love I felt for the man who gave us a common bond. They work hard to surprise me each year with a new "party favor." This year was no exception. You see, Scott had this costume that he wore. His favorite outfit was always a t-shirt or polo shirt, jean shorts, white socks past his ankles, tennis shoes and a ball cap. So in our t-shirt and jean shorts they added ball caps to party. It was funny for me because Scott was always trying to get me to wear a cap with my hair in a pony through the back. For some reason that was the look he found "hot!" I could hear him telling me so when I put it on my head and pulled my hair into the pony. 

The amazing part of the outfit was the socks. Our closets are separate and I don't have need for his so it more of a storage spot for his stuff, luggage, sheets and such. The other day I went in to his closet to get down sheets for the housekeeper to change the linens and I noticed his sock storage tub was open. I just laughed and closed it. Why would I need to get into the storage container with his socks and such? The next night Matt sent a text and told us to make sure we remembered to wear our Scott "uniform" to the draft. I started laughing and thought I could do one better and wear his socks. I certainly can't fit into his jean shorts! I never knew a pair of socks could bring so much joy when just being silly. I'm not attached to them but it was the memories they brought back. The times when we lived in the moments of small tasks together. Sitting on the bed watching him dress for the day and teasing him about how he put his socks on his feet. Matt making fun of his ankle high socks he always wore. The comfort of routines and "traditions."

Living in the small moments are where I want to be. I know how to make it to the big picture but if you miss the small times then the big picture just doesn't matter. Take the time to laugh with a friend, enjoy a surprise encounter with your daughter and her dad, laugh, joke and yes even a few inappropriate jokes with they guys. These are the moments that make up my life. These are just a  piece of a day that forms the big puzzle of my life. A phone call on a Friday at the end of a long week that makes me smile and for an odd reason makes my heart soar, a request to hold my hand and help me through a surprise moment of sorrow, a cuddle in my bed at the end of a busy day laughing at cat videos with Hannah and even the connections across the country with friends because of that new fangled invention - the Internet. I cherish all the small stuff in my life because it makes me whole. 

Please remember that life can be gone in an instant and if you don't live in the moments that complete the day it really doesn't matter in the end. I know I want the review of my life to matter because I stopped to smell the roses one last time and found the details in the petals are what made it greater beauty.