Window Shades

If a window of opportunity appears, don't pull down the shade.
      - Tom Peters


Yes I'm searching for those opportunities. I think I may be finding them too! I have great people that help me along the way. I know I will continue to take each day as it is given. I have to make some changes to make it to my wish but I'm working on it. 


It was funny today when I went into the jewelers to have my rings cleaned. I love it when they sparkle and shine. It reminds me of a beautiful early morning when a certain someone was so nervous "the ring" couldn't stay hidden. I gave him such a hard time but the truth is, and he knew it, he did achieve a surprise. It is very hard to surprise me. Ask Hannah she'll tell you I always ruin the surprises. I knew about the ring. I'd helped him pick it out but he made the final decision. I love the sparkly glittery shine. It always reminds me of the twinkle in his brown eyes. So all shined and sparkled. The lady at the store asked me if I was dating yet. She is a different one then my favorite. I'm so glad that question has gotten easier. 


I think it has become so much easier because it is the toughest question I ask myself. I have desensitized myself to the question. You know I discuss it here often enough. I can phrase the question two ways.  Am I ready to go there yet or is it the right guy is there yet? Either way I think the question is funny now. I used to ponder all the things that I would have to do to get there. I think I really know the answer even on my worst days - when the time is right. Someday I feel so alone. It is that knowledge of what being in a truly loving lifetime relationship means. Some very large shoes but not impossible. I know where my heart wants to be. 


Life keeps moving forward. I keep making choices. Right or wrong they are my choices. I'm scared but I was scared when Scott was alive. I don't have the answers but I keep looking for the opportunities to get to my wish. I know I am surrounded by light and love. My Angelic DJ has been in full force today. I believe! The person I end up with has to believe too. My life has to many moments of magic. I'm ready for some more magic next week. I need a break to make some decisions about doors and windows that have become wide open. Please grant me the wisdom to make the right choices for my daughter. I have plenty of time to focus on my own wishes later.