Election Day

But more importantly it is Cookie Monster's birthday. Why do you say that is more important then voting because Scott was my Cookie Monster. I've never know someone who could eat so very much and stay so skinny but not care that I was round. He would get dessert, mostly cookies places like McAllister's or Fuddruckers. He would NOT eat them but bring them home and sit them on the counter. They would sit there. He wouldn't eat them! They could sit there for weeks and he wouldn't notice when I finally threw them away. He would sometimes eat them but not very often if he took them home. His drawers in his dresser are full of candy. Mickey chocolate bars he asked me to buy in Florida, cherry sours from his Christmas stocking, starbursts, valentine candy from our first Valentine's Day together in Shreveport. He had to just pretend to eat that stuff but I know it's not true. I watched him eat candy, cookies and brownies and not gain a pound. He would tell me not true that he had been gaining weight because he was happy and in love.

This morning I finally ran out of toilet paper people brought me after he died. It has taken seven months. I keep thinking about how it would have lasted a month with him around. The paper towels, laundry detergent and trash bags are still going strong. I can't tell you how much I appreciate the people who brought those things to us. I hate feeling so crappy. I hate that people still worry about me but I'm glad that they do. It keeps me going. I still have steps to take through this process but I'm getting there in my own time. I have to listen to my heart and continue pacing myself. Scott and his love will continue to surround me and we will love to infinity and beyond. Someday I will hold his hand again and feel his touch.

Tonight the vote has shown change in the air - our 20 year Democratic Congressman, Chet Edwards has just conceded. That is the real power of the people of this country. Change is in the air not just for me but for the entire country. That is what this country is about. It may not be easy but we can all walk the path of change.

I will make it through this path of change as I continue to deal with my own personal journey. I know that I'm not alone and that I continue to have my own supporters who will hold me up even when I don't know I need it. I have so many blessings that continue and I will forever be grateful to so many who touch my life.