Cliff Diving

"Remember that fear always lurks behind perfectionism. Confronting your fears and allowing yourself the right to be human can, paradoxically, make you a far happier and more productive person." -Dr. David M. Burns

I can say this to myself but I know at least one other person I'd love to say this too . I have achieved so much yet here I am living in fear of my life. I can run a big ticket therapy department. Be one of the top producing teams for the country and provide quality care at the same time but I can't just leap! Scott and I were by no means the super perfect couple but we loved each other. Can you believe I'm afraid of love? I don't want to fail. I don't think I could live through a broke n heart again.

You know. When we are younger it all seems so much easier. Jump off and try. If you go under just move your arms and legs. You'll get somewhere. Why is it okay to hide myself away? I have found the perfect way to do it too! I'm not telling yet because for now it works. I think my unintentional cohort has hopefully figured it out too. It's funny because I'm not a manipulative person. Sure I like to get my way but who doesn't! However I'm not mean spirited or vengeful. Right now I've found the best way to protect myself and I must say I'm very proud of myself. I'm not out for perfection but I'm am out for protection. That is one mean world out there and I think when I'm finally in the right place to leap it will have to be with a person I trust completely. That cliff is a rather large one to be diving off of into the Sea below!