New Life Math

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.
       - Proverbs 29:11


Let me just say that I tried really hard not to lose it this afternoon but at moments I didn't succeed. I worked through it and could hear Scott in my head. At that point it was all I could do not to laugh. I knew what Scott would be thinking. At that moment I missed his ability to work really hard and make a difference in the world without demanding attention. I took the great points of my day and went there. I just know there are some people I have to just smile and move on. I got the answers I needed from the interaction and my anger was gone. I moved on.


I had a great day, a great conversation and my favorite food. I got a ton of things done and worked hard and fast. I sat with a friend today talking about life, Angels and the great beyond. It is closer then we think until you need them. I know things with all my heart and someday I may find the place where that happiness is most of the time again. I reach for the stars and maybe I will find the moon! 


I'm willing to try new things. I am happy with who I am. I'm not perfect. I make mistakes in my life but I know I do what I feel is the best in the moment. I pray for continued light and love. I know I am given strength and courage to make it through the rough spots. I miss my life but I am becoming more comfortable in my new one. I still want to reach out and do the unexpected but I'm afraid. I don't know if I'm ready for the chance to be broken again. I'm afraid to be more then I am in this moment in time. I have finally become comfortable knowing I am where I am supposed to be and not worry so much about the risks that I need to take to leap into the unknown. Let me keep taking the baby steps for now. Somehow they have begun to add up to a new life.