Gary Allan - No Regrets

She's been gone about three years
It's been a long road and a million tears
I'm movin slow but I'm movin on
The sweetest memories still remain
The laughter we had and the love that we made
Every night I go to bed alone

With no regrets
A piece of mind
Lived so much time in so little time
I'm so glad when she was here
She was mine
From the day we met
To the night she leftI loved her, no regrets

Well time and fate can be controlled
You play the hand that you're dealt
And the dice that you rolled
And who might of questioned God anyway
Well these days when I look back
I know I'm blessed to be loved like that
I still miss her everyday

With no regrets
A piece of mind
Lived so much time in so little time
I'm so glad when she was here she was mine
From the day we met
To the night she left
I loved her, no regrets

From the day we met
To the night she left
I loved her, no regrets

No regrets
I loved her
With no regrets

- Gary Allen


This morning I sat in the floor of the bathroom crying while the shower ran. I'm not sure why I seem to do this but it certainly isn't like it used to be. I sat there thinking about how much I miss him. I finally just asked where he was. I needed him and he wasn't there for me. He promised and there I was sitting on the bathroom floor in the dark with the shower running. I don't know how or why I ended up here but I did. I ask for Scott to show me he still is with me. I know he is but sometimes I'm just so alone and don't know where I should be in my life. I always ask for strength, guidance and protection.


Then about the middle of my day I was handed this CD and told to listen to track 10. Carol told me she heard it and knew I had to hear it. She explained about Gary Allan and how his wife committed suicide. She told me he uses his music the way I use my blog to heal. I was also blessed to hear how much my blog means to her. She wanted me to know that if I stopped writing she would miss me and I have an impact with my words that express more then she ever could. Carol left my office and I pulled out the work laptop and listened to both tracks she wanted me to hear. I was instantly crying but track 10 sent me over the waterfall of tears. I have no regrets over our love. Scott was in my life at a time we were supposed to be together.




Rhonda sat there with me and wrapped me into a big hug. My world was there and I wasn't alone. I knew Scott gave me another musical message through another friend. You see I asked and suddenly from a very unexpected source I hear him. I'm not living my life in a crazy nonfunctional way. I have the strength to keep going. I'm making it but I still like to know that love is forever. I will always miss him but that doesn't stop me from living forward. Rhonda was with me for a reason when I listened to the music. I felt a connection to a musician that I know of but not personally. Maybe there will be a day when I can share my thanks to Gary Allan for his music. I know I'm not alone in losing a love which makes me know I will find what I wish for. I want to be able to look in the mirror again and understand the person looking back at me. I don't know who is the reflection. It doesn't feel like me. I see the person but I'm still learning who she is, learning who I am one day at a time.