Wings of Hope

Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul.
      - Emily Dickenson


I did something this morning that took a bunch of effort! I have had this piece of Ferrero Rocher chocolate sitting on my bathroom counter for the last 17 months. It was the last piece of chocolate that I could never bring myself to eat from a package we bought at the grocery store on our last date night. It was so funny because he then surprised me the next morning with a giant bunny of chocolates. Those are still wrapped up tight. It is a huge self control not to eat them. Right after Scott died there was no way I was eating them because I wasn't eating. Now I could eat myself out of house and home when it comes to chocolate.


It may seem silly that one piece of chocolate can represent so much in my life. I was cleaning up this morning so my housekeeper could do the rest. She has been great all these month. She doesn't move stuff like that and if she does I can't tell. So for me to purposely choose to pick it up and toss it in the trash is another great step for me. It seems so much easier! I am taking control of my life.


My week has been super crazy but I ended on a great note. I love moments that make me smile and laugh. I love knowing that I do have wings on my soul. I really am making so many steps in each day. I don't know what each day holds but I have come through fire. My heart is still healing but I am not alone in this world. I have great friends that sharing war stories and silly moments make each day worth the effort. It makes it worth fighting all the traffic and roadblocks to keep living forward.