Superbowl Bunk!

Superbowl Sunday. Another day that I woke up saying we should have been doing this and we did this last year! Can someone just get me through this first freaking year! Enough kicks in the hiney and slaps in the face. I get it! I have to live my life differently. I have to live forward. I know my heart still works because I know I'm not dead. I tried but you can't cry yourself there!

I've not cried today. It is more of the anger kind of day. I told Hannah the only reason I would watch is because the show is on FOX and that equals my favorite player/announcer! Yes I have always had a crush on Troy Aikman. Which is funny because I could care less about someones famous life! Scott thought it was funny and always teased me.

Last year Superbowl Sunday ended in lots of fun. I'm pretty sure that isn't happening. I've done a really good job avoiding it today except the halftime show. It was funny watching the girls yell at the TV. We did better then that and we stood right there! It is funny the little stuff in your life that brings enjoyment. I'm trying not to be angry today. It seems a bit foreign because I don't generally feel that emotion. I know Scott had wanted to be at this game. That was the plan. We were supposed to be in that stadium. A bucket list item = attend a Superbowl game. I guess it can stay on the list. I'd like to go someday but for now it is okay that I'm avoiding the game.

I learned a long time ago - if it is important enough someone will share! The score is being shared. I will know who wins but to me it doesn't really matter. This is the first year ever that I haven't rooted for one of the teams playing. So today I root for my Chiefs. Shh! I know they aren't playing but I can pretend! It's more fun then being angry over a death and a football game! I have to journey through these emotions it is just funny how they arrive in strange packages!