Daddy Love

Well it's cold windy and yucky. Fits my mood. I seemed to have slipped from my happiness and I'm struggling to those happy moments again. I was doing so well. Last night I cried myself to sleep. I haven't done that in sometime but it's okay this too shall pass right. It's just realizing that people take for granted what is right in front of them is heartbreaking. The stuff in your life doesn't matter but really when the crap happens you need to forgive and love. I didn't say you have to like but well forgiveness is within your power.

Today the most important man in my life would have been 71! My life has always been hard. There are so many things I would wish for, Scott and Dad are the two that I can't have. It is really funny because they were so much alike yet they didn't meet until Heaven. I would like to have seen that meeting. When Scott talked I could hear my dad handing me love.

Today my sadness continues and I will fight how to deal with the sadness. I will help someone realize that life is precious and forgiveness is the only way to live life to the fullest. Love matters; being loved and giving love are a must for my life. I have been reminded of that love numerous times today. Yes music is magic and friends are unstoppable. Scott always knows when to send the right song even sitting in the orthodontist's office and I was reminded today that I matter to more people then just Hannah.

Where's the "I will survive" song right now? If you love someone never leave them behind! Daddy and Scott are always in their spaces in my heart. I think I will make it but it is okay to have down days. I know my Daddy would have given the world to have lived further into his life. He didn't choose to leave my brother and I behind. We were his world but not the only part of his world. That I understand but he taught us to love. I found love that I don't ever want replaced but I do believe when and if I'm ever ready I will find the courage to live that life again. Not yet but I can do with all the friends I have in my life and I always have room for one more!