Bad Punchlines!

I am in charge of my own happiness! I know that but have you just ever had one of those days where you just want to choke someone. I've had one on those days. Remember that negative Nelly widow whose husband died five years ago? Well she WAS one of my employees. Today, this am more specifically she walked into my office, told everyone to leave and proceeded to tell me she was walking out on her job. Her reason was that it was not a good fit for her and I was not any good at being a boss. I was too young and maybe in some years I would find out how to be a better boss. Now on Friday's I have deadlines! I don't just mean one but so much that by 11 am I have done a days worth of work.  I just looked at her after her tirade on my character and said, "I need to get these reports done." She looked at me and proceeded to start in on me again. I was impressed with my ability to bite my tongue and say "I wish you well."

My heart just doesn't work that way. I feel so sad for her but I will not let her inability to live a joyous life effect me. I know that in my life I touch many lives and there has to be just one I matter to and for. I know that because I see the future in her. In the life I helped create. The one thing in my life where I was the ultimate carrier of God's love of life.

I reached out for my friends today. I took my staff, whom I count as friends, to lunch. I asked another friend for a joke. I'm still groaning over that one but hey he tried and it did make me smile. I have so many great people in my life. I called my boss. We had been talking about the problem all week. Trying to come up with ways to make it work, to help this person succeed in her job. She didn't want to succeed. My boss is wonderful she started laughing and told me I was one of the best Directors she has. I have done with a team and a building that could never find peace. I can't get along with everyone but I sure try.

I will just keep trying. I will keep trying in each day I'm given to look for the positive and keep trying to make a difference in lives of the others around me. I have only walked in my shoes. I don't walk in anyone else's shoes because mine give me blisters every so often and I don't have enough bandages for my feet to do their marathon! 

So here it is Friday night. I'm home alone. I'm stuck in my world but I'm happy in my world tonight. I have my Netflix to keep me company. I am finding my inner peace and listening for the cues to keep me on my path. I may sleep but I doubt it will be for longer then two hour spurts. I have a life to live and even if it is a quiet day I need the mental break. I need to keep living forward into each new day and treasure each one I've been given. Even when those days include negative Nelly's! Now if someone has a way to get the punchline to a bad joke out of my head I'm open to suggestions!