More Steps Forward

More life is happening. How have I done this. I have really just taken myself out of whatever box I've been in all these years and changed. I have just taken a giant leap in the last two weeks. Tonight I have officially become part of the executive committee for next years Band Backers, as the Hospitality co-Chair. I love all those kids. Like I said really outside my comfort zone. I guess it is time to put my social skills to the test but it's all good, right? After 20 years as a Speech Therapist I can do all that entails it is my comfort zone but joining the parents after I've spent all these years running from the PTA. Just call me crazy. I'm sure it will be fun but I guess I need some kind of social life. What better way then feeding the band! I'm ready for football season again. I love that adrenaline!

While I was at the meeting tonight I was social, smiling and talking. I started chatting with the nice lady next to me. I found myself sharing part of my story. I had tears as always but I was lifted by another new person in my life. You see our girls have been friends for a while and she is an Occupational Therapist. This is a small town and I think I am glad I live here. There are so many people who have held me up with a support system you wouldn't get anywhere else. It is amazing because we even talked about religion and the Augustine Sabbatical. A point in a person's religious life where you take a break to regroup and then come back as a changed person. I think I'm there right now. I haven't lost my beliefs or spiritual faith but I'm at a crossroads in my life. Along came God handing me more guidance as I ask for daily.

I started my day out wondering who stole my starter for my body engine and now here I am, once again, another step in my journey to living forward. I guess if this is where my path is taking me then I guess I will keep accepting my journey as it is presented. I'm not afraid of what life has to offer. I'm ready to keep going until I can join my life on the other plane. I know it isn't my time just a thought that enters my mind from time to time. Tomorrow is a new day and I'm looking forward to it. I'm looking forward to a day of lots of smiles. Maybe those smiles can be more then just the few moments that have been real. Maybe one day I can have more then one person I talk to without thinking about Scott. Right now I'm good with knowing it is a possibility because if I can do that with one person why can't I keep learning to be different then I was two weeks ago? In God all things are possible! Surround me with your light and love, guide me, protect me and show me the way.

Now if I can ever find a way to sleep! Anyone have any suggestions because I'd sure like to know a secret for sleep that doesn't include meds. I'd like to sleep longer then 2 hours at a time. I've done it once and well I must say it was worth it with the dreams but well sleeping once a year isn't enough! So let's see what I can do in all my extra time I have not sleeping!!! I keep going not just for Scott but for myself. I know I have it in me to being this new person. If I didn't I wouldn't have taken so many steps living forward.