The Hereafter!

I tried to sink myself into a hidden abyss today. I slept and slept and slept. I tried to do that all day but eventually the meds wear off. I wandered around the house moving things from one spot to the other. I'm not sad or depressed just lost. Does that make sense? I feel lost wandering around the house. I'm not sure I have a purpose today. I tried to make sense of my space and where I belong. I am so very different then I was before.

I looked outside the front window and found my Cardinal in my yard. I was able to capture his image and suddenly my spirit felt lighter. I can't explain the feelings but I felt love. I sat for 30 minutes watching as he would look straight at me. I was in the house sitting on the floor looking out the window. I was much better and not dwelling on life and the pain.

I rented the movie Hereafter! I'm sitting here feeling so many things watching this movie. Most of all I understand but yet I don't understand. I don't know what I should be doing today but I like to step out, smell the air and feel the warmth of the sun. I want a life to lead. I want to make each moment count. I'm glad today was a day that ended up counting. I was lost but I found myself somehow today. I found myself in my heart. I can make it. I will make it. Today was the last day of all the firsts for the year. I have a place in this world I am to be. I know I'm guided. I know we each have a reason for being in each other's lives. Take the time to touch another. Find the time to step outside your box and reach for a hand to hold.  It will be worth it sometime when you least expect it!