My Perfect Date!

I had the most perfect date tonight. It was just what I needed. No I'm not dating a guy. I spent a wonderful day with my beautiful daughter. We hung out. I did some work while watching her sunbathe, jump into the pool to immediately get out. I was multitasking but I was most importantly relaxing. My mind was not a jumble of interruptions of other people's to do lists. I got to focus on some things I need do for work but can never start because I get interrupted. My job is about juggling other people's priorities with a smile on my face and a get it done attitude. That was Friday for me. I don't mind most of the time, sometimes it is a bit much. I guess that means I am the ultimate politician!

Today was about Hannah and I (with a bit of work thrown in that she didn't see)! She is my world and my life and I will never have it any other way. We were together and we decided we needed our own date night after spending a day by the pool. Hannah and I clean up real nice I must say. We made a few stops then to the movies to drool over Matthew McConaughey and Josh Lucas in Lincoln Lawyer. Good movie, camera movement made me a bit dizzy at times but I was riveted to trying to figure out all the details. It was a good movie tonight it made me think and that is something I have tried to avoid in my free time.

After the movie we went to a late dinner. I had planned on cooking today but somewhere in my enjoyment of the day I forgot to thaw the chicken. Oh well it will still be frozen tomorrow if I don't remember to get it out again. The best part of dinner was having very grown up conversations. We talked about so many things. The question that startled me the most was when Hannah asked, "Mom, what are you going to do when I go to college?" My very grown up little girl worries so much about me. I honestly answered her, "I don't know. A lot can happen in three years! Look at Scott and I!" I answered her with tears in my eyes. I try to focus on the here and now. I used to have a life map but not anymore. I know it can all be gone tomorrow.

Last year at this time, Scott, Laynie, Hannah and I were at the movies. I know this because 1- I have the ticket stubs. I found them in my Mickey sweat jacket pocket after Scott died. 2 - I remember standing in the hall of the theater with Scott and Laynie waiting for Hannah to get out of her movie. There was nobody else around and Scott kept peaking his head into Hannah's theater to see if he could spot her, to see if there were boys involved. Moments in time, snapshots of life that was amazingly perfect for the short three years we lived together.

Scott and Laynie and I saw "How to Train Your Dragon." Laynie had decided she wanted a Shrek 4 party for her birthday. She stood up and pointed at the preview with sheer joy and excitement. Scott didn't get to see her do this because he went and got us drinks but we told him when he got back. He was loving helping her make her a decision about learning how she could choose things for herself not just because Hannah did it.

Today was very different then my perfect date last year. It is my perfect date in my new life for today. I have learned how to be happy in the moments I've been given. My life with Scott wasn't that I had to have a man in it. He was a force of his own. We were two separate people who recognized that loving each other was worth all the hurdles. We shared a life and love that is in my heart forever. Scott is his own person to me. I don't know what my future brings other then taking the time to be more then a to do list for work. That is there and if I can squeeze in a few moments it is good but it will still be there even after I take time for just me. Today was about Hannah and I! My perfect date with my beautiful daughter. I can only pray for more days like today! I hope tomorrow brings more moments of snapshots of memories. Those moments have given me an outlook that is truly me. I refuse to be bitter or mean that wasn't who I was before why should I be that now!

If you have a life that you can find a middle ground stop and look around because there has to be a hand to reach out and hold. Everyone needs a moment, a snapshot of love and kindness. Don't let your past keep you from living forward. There is someone right under you nose who may need you! I believe we all land in each other's lives for a reason but we don't get to decide why and if we are lucky maybe we do get to understand. Reach out and hold a hand. Stop what you are doing and go on that perfect date! Make a memory with someone of any age it will matter and you won't know it until it's too late!